\nWho says self-delusion is all negative? Optimism is a form of self-delusion that’s related to an “11 to 15% longer life span, on average, and to greater odds of achieving ‘exceptional longevity,’ that is, living to the age of 85 or beyond.”
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This was shown in a long-term study of men and women and it held true even after accounting for demographics and initial health conditions. Adjusting for health behaviors slightly weakened the link, but the optimistic folks still came out on top, regardless of gender.
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Unlike previous research, this study zeroes in on extraordinary longevity, suggesting that a sunny outlook can help you live not just longer but healthier too. It’s my nature to be optimistic, so of course I love this study. (Strangely I’m also inclined towards depression–maybe the two coexist in me because I’m a Gemini😉.)
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But even if you tend towards pessimism, there are a couple of things you can try. If they don’t shift your perspective, at least they won’t hurt you, so I can’t see any reason NOT to try (which is exactly what an optimist would say).
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You can read the entire published study here.
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✴️Visualize your best possible self
\nImagine your dream life in 10 years — what would it look like? How would it feel? Now sit down and write about it: once a week, for six to eight minutes, for one or two months. Spend each session focusing on your “best possible self” in a single domain, such as family, career, romance or health.
\nThough it might sound like wishful thinking, dozens of studies show that imagining your ideal future can actually boost your levels of optimism. It works because you’re strengthening your “optimistic muscles” by thinking about all your dreams coming true as opposed to worrying about the worst possible outcome.
✴️Accept the inevitability of disappointment
\nConstantly expecting the worst? It might be because you’re hoping to protect yourself from disappointment.But by trying to insulate yourself from life’s ups and downs, you’re missing out on something else, too: the “positive anticipation of events.”
\nYou’ll be disappointed at times no matter what, so if your choice is between positive expectations that are occasionally proven wrong or negative expectations that are occasionally proven right, you might as well go with the former. While this mind-set shift is easier described than done, it can help to remember that many of the negative things we predict never actually happen—and that, even when they do, we usually recover pretty quickly.
✴️Argue against yourself
\nSo your co-worker got the promotion you were angling for. And your mind is filling with thoughts like: I’m bad at my job. I’ll never move up the ladder. I might as well quit right now.
\nWhen you enter that pessimism spiral, the trick is to first recognize the voice making those negative remarks, then argue with it as if it were an external person whose mission in life is to make you miserable.
\nHow would you argue with your nemesis? You’d present evidence to prove them wrong, such as: I’m not bad at my job–my co-worker has been here for two years longer than I have. Or: I’ll eventually get promoted–another position is opening up soon.
✴️Put things in perspective
\nAnother evidence-based approach to boost your optimism is to intentionally counteract your extremely negative predictions with extremely positive ones. This will enable you to find the middle of the road perspective.
\nLet’s say you have a doozy of a fight with your partner and you start to catastrophize: This is the end, I’m unlovable, I’m going to die alone. As a counterbalance, imagine the least catastrophic interpretation, too: Your partner’s on the way home with a tub of ice cream and will never mention the disagreement again.
\nBetween those two poles is where you’ll find the more realistic interpretation. It might be: He’ll come back in a few hours, we’ll talk, it’ll be weird tomorrow and then back to normal. Though not as pleasant as the ice cream scenario, this outlook is far better (and far more plausible) than the ultra-pessimistic one with which you started.
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